Tired of dating? Fed up with weeding through the singles market only to find yourself spending an evening with yet another dud? Well, I have the solution for you! Date a robot, also known as an android or mechanical human type creature.
Why settle for another lonely, sad night in front of your computer (cybering?) when you could be out with your perfect match, custom made and completely there for you, only you. Designed to meet your specifications for everything from hair colour to taste in movies. Like big hands on a guy? No problem. Like big hooters on a woman? You can help her lift those puppies around when her bra straps snap. Fill out the order form, pay for your purchase and decide when you want delivery. Simple as that.
Well, not quite. As we know there are no robodates. You can't have a date on command, built to perform and live up to all your expectations. We are stuck with each other, for now. But, think, what if there were robodates, men and women made to order?
No more worrying about sexual disease, no need to buy condoms either. You can sleep with your robotic date on the first date or never, however it suits you. But, there is no fear of catching any STDs, AIDS or herpes. Avoiding pregnancy is not a problem, unless you want it to be.
Think of the perfect date, then live it. No waiting for your date to show up. No wondering if he or she will like you, ditch you or pretend to laugh at your jokes. No need to agonize over pick up lines or dressing to impress. Your date will already be impressed. Just as if they had taken a love potion, you are exactly what they want, desire and look for. In short, they are already programmed to want to be with you. No matter what you think of yourself, your date will think you are the greatest thing since sliced bologna.
Of course, robodate is prepared for anything you want to do. If you want to go dancing robo date is a good dancer and can sing along to any song. Like to go camping, no problem. Robodate is athletically inclined and always in good shape. Long for a decent chess partner or someone to cuddle up with and be a couch potato? Not a problem for robodate. He or she will be content with your choice of activity or non activity. Robodate is a great companion.
None of your fetishes will gross out or annoy robodate. Ask for what you want. Whether you want a cuddly sex kitten, a fiery Domme, a total slut, a strong submissive man, a romantic poet or a sadistic Dom robodate can handle it, and you! Make your list and check it twice, robodate doesn't wear out, he or she only needs to be re-charged once a month. If you have no sexual use for robodate you can always enjoy a great full body massage or have him or her clean your car. Whatever you'd like.
Robodate will not forget your important dates such as anniversaries and birthdays. You can bring robodate home to meet your family where he or she will either shock or amaze them, as you choose.
Some may think a robodate would be too mechanical, too perfect or too impersonal. But that's not so. Robodates are programmed to mesh with your personality, your likes and dislikes but there is room for individuality, passions and independence. Just enough to keep them interesting and not sounding like some one with no mind of their own, some mindless drone.
After the date, however things turned out, robodate will be ready for a second date. However if you never choose to call that's fine too. Robodate will not become some crazy stalker or hang around desperately waiting for you, all clingy and needy. After a month your robotic date will simply be recycled back into the system, all the parts are reusable. Robotic dates are environmentally friendly and run on solar power.
What does a human have over an android? Read Scanny's column to see what he thinks.
