My style of sex and of religion are both controversial. Kind of funny considering I'm such a nice, straight laced, goodie type of person. People are pretty surprised if I mention that I'm a Witch and I enjoy BDSM.
I do see being a Witch and into kinkiness as good for a relationship. A relationship needs to grow and there are so many ways for it to grow and change as I explore kinky ideas. Yet, I still have my base, know where I will and won't go, due to my Pagan ideals.
Most people think BDSM is kind of sick and how could anyone into Paganism rationalize being into pain. Well, first of all, I'm not into pain. BDSM isn't about pain. Just as being a Witch isn't about dancing naked under a full moon waiting for the devil to appear for wild sex. (Not that I haven't read a few naughty stories about just that sort of thing).
Witches don't believe in hell, we don't fraternize with devils and we don't mind a good time in bed. In fact, it's highly recommended by 3 out of 4 Witches. I don't think I need to rationalize it. Not for myself. But, for those curious and still reading this, I'll try to give you an idea of how I see it.
BDSM is mostly about seduction and sensuality. I don't want to spend my Saturday afternoon whipping people. I don't fantasize about various flushable body fluids. I don't enjoy having my toes worshipped. Though I've yet to actually try that one, if done right I might like it. Who knows?...
Secondly, being a Witch is about life, energies, nature and basically - stepping lightly over the Earth. If it doesn't harm anyone or anything, its ok. Just as whatever two consenting adults do is up to them. If I want to tie up my boyfriend and torment him for awhile (with his full and happy consent) what does it matter to the rest of the world or the planet as a whole? It's my thing. No children or animals are hurt in the making of our bed sport.
Sure I do have some fantasies that cross the line. But, those are fantasies. Like a rape fantasy, it's something to think about, use to please yourself, but not something you would really want to happen.
Thirdly, I'm far from the only BDSM Witch. Elements of both are intertwined. Witches have rituals and BDSM is about control and also has strict guidelines. Some people take BDSM as a religion in itself. They keep the codes of consent and power play as their mantra. At any moment they can quote the rules for safe BDSM as another Pagan would quote the Wiccan Rede.
Last of all, I think BDSM and Witches go together well. Witches don't believe in causing harm, thus we are the best people to take that aspect of BDSM seriously and not fool around with it. Karma and the Threefold Rule are basically about whatever you do coming back to get you. As a Pagan you take your actions that cause harm seriously.
