Apparently I'm a good kisser. This is something I've wondered about. But, I have it on the authority of John, that I am. John is a guy I met in the bookstore this week. Kind of nice looking, Greek with brown eyes, black hair and all that 5 o'clock shadow a grrl could lust for. But, he wasn't interesting. How can a man have no interests beyond sports, his job and TV? To be interesting you need to have interests. Pretty basic to me. Anyway, if I take John at his word, I'm a good kisser.
Since I'm not entirely sure just what John wanted the whole kissing thing is a bit up in the air. But, I've decided to decide I'm a good kisser anyway.
Is it standard practice for a guy to pick up a woman while she's innocently reading, buy her a coffee and then kiss her in the parking lot? All in the space of, at the most, three hours? It seemed a bit rushed to me. I did tell him I'm in a relationship. I did tell him I'm not used to kissing on a first date. I did hesitate at the word date (I forget what I actually said) since that wasn't what I'd call a date. Shouldn't a date be where you arrange to do something together, after you already meet for that first initial meeting thing?
Maybe I'm just too old fashioned. Maybe there are no more dates, just pick ups. I don't want some kind of pick up date. I want a real date. I don't want to feel rushed.
I wasn't ready for him to take my hands and start feeling them up. I wasn't ready for him to take my hand and lead me out of the bookstore as if we were already a long time couple. I really, really, really felt unready when he started the kissing. That nice girls don't thing is a double edged deal when it comes to being kissed and not hurting his feelings. I did say I didn't want to kiss after the first one. But, that didn't stop John. What would have stopped John? I don't know.
I think John, while far too fast, was mostly harmless. But, I did feel worried and watched to see if I was being followed on the long drive home. Although I did give him my email address I made sure not to give out enough information so he could find the new house. If I wasn't a nice girl I would have never let that happen. Being nice is a trap. Maybe I'm just some paranoid old maid type, but I didn't like feeling rushed and pressured in those ways that only nice girls get stuck with.
I'm worth the time, dammit! I don't think John will get to find that out though. He just wasn't interesting enough.
