06 January 2020

Mermaid Bras for the Girls Who Like Ocean Fashion

Would you wear a mermaid bra? I don't think they were created for creatures of comfort but they sure are pretty and sparkly. This one comes from an Etsy shop - Crystal Monique Design.

05 January 2020

Can't Win for Trying

Hi Mistress
I hope you're having a good day. I'm submissive, obedient and love to please. I'd love to fall under your spell and be a good boy for you. Hopefully we can talk soon :)


Hello Mindless. Did you enjoy the holidays? I've been away and have not thought about the Fetlife site. Looks like you got discouraged and took your profile down. I thought I would give it (the site) a spin again back in December. I've had a profile for years. Never got to know one person I didn't already know from the Coffee Nights in Barrie. The site would, or could, be good if the people were not so broken. 99% of the men write the same note you sent me. Of those, none of them followed through. I met at least three for coffee. A one time thing, unless you count rescheduling for those who didn't show up and then wanted a second, or third chance. One played me along for a year with endless excuses about not being able to meet for one reason and then another. Two just wanted sex and of those, one never even looked at my face. Ugh! Nothing is going to change. I have found the men say all of that and don't really mean any of it. Do you know how disappointing that becomes? You can't please me without finding out what pleases me. You don't know who I am without talking to me. I think men write these notes as if we are all blow up sex dolls. Not a person at all. But, what you (or men from this site in general) really want is for me to please you, to give you what you want. I would enjoy a real submissive man but I would not enjoy one who promises to serve me as if it were all that simple. There should be so much more to it. I want a partnership of two people, with interests in common and a real life and everything. You probably won't read this. You may not learn anything from it. People seem so set on defending their righteousness and bludgeoning everyone who doesn't agree - without really listening and wondering if someone else could have a point. So, if you read this, go ahead and tell me how wrong I am, how terrible I and the women/ people on this site are and how no one understands. I've heard it all before. Happy New Year!

Hi Mistress.
My holidays were pretty good thanks. How were yours?
Yes, I did get discouraged. I wasn't very impressed with this place. I wouldn't have known you sent a message if i didn't get an email about it. You are actually the only non-prostitute that's replied in the entire time I've been here.
I do understand what you mean. It seems no one is really serious, it's frustrating. I would look at your face too, lol..
You don't seem terrible, I'd be interested in knowing more about you

Why are you mindless? I had a husband who considered himself a Dom but he was kind of a needy person and afraid to try new things or take any risks. As I've gotten older I take less risks than I used to. But, I like when I push myself a bit. I'm building websites for myself. I've taken them all down and put them back up and then taken them down again. I don't know if you make sites or are involved in any of that. But, after making my own sites and writing online, I've come to the point where I want to try a new idea, or method, of doing things. I have not settled on what that will be yet. Anyway, that's what I do. I wrote a lot about myself in my profile so there isn't much to add about books I like to read, etc. I once had a real submissive man, an online relationship because he was an Englishman living in Hong Kong at the time. Even long distance, it was the best BDSM relationship I have ever had and it lasted two years or more.

Forgot to say, holidays were quiet on the actual holiday but busy with family before the holidays. I visited my sisters and their families. Looked after the kids, who are not all little any more. Exchanged presents on Boxing Day and had a nice dinner. Caught a cold and lost my voice a few days. I don't mind losing my voice. For one thing, it's an interesting experience. For another, I have a reason to talk less. I come from a family of people who enjoy talking. My nephew, now a young man working downtown in Toronto, came to visit me for New Years. But he had to go back in time for the New Year's Eve shift at work.
Being paid for sex doesn't interest me. I've had times without money but I still think it's basically paying someone so you can rape them. Money is not consent or enjoyment. I really think people should be better than that.

No, I don't build sites or anything. I don't do much online really.
I'm not sure why mindless, It was just a name i picked that fit what I was looking for.
Busy is good, it's nice to see people. Mine were pretty busy too,but it's always that way.
I hope you're feeling better. You don't have to talk though to get your point across.
Was is it you like about submissive men?

I've made my coffee and I'm going to get to work after this. I don't have notifications for fresh posts from any site. I don't like nagging software or that ridiculous pressure to not miss anything on social media. I do a lot online but I don't want to be stuck to it. I don't own a mobile phone and that new technology, smart home stuff, is not for me either.
What do I like about submissive men... well, the question assumes the man is submissive in the right way. A real submissive man is very hard to find. Most men call themselves submissive and then make demands with a list of fetishes and such. Often these are things they would not like in reality. Men seem to have ideas of submission based on pornography and they expect a Dominant woman to fit in with that, wearing shiny black leather, high heeled boots and carrying a whip. She is expected to perform. Allowing them to serve her by having her boots licked (how does that serve her?) and assorted other things she may or may not like or want at all in reality.
I would like the reality. Few couples seem to have found that. But, I like the idea of a submissive man, as I see it, because I'm kind of bossy and I like doing things my way. I tend to believe I am right about everything too. I do listen to other opinions - I love to learn and you can't learn if you only listen to ideas and opinions which agree with you. So, what I like about submissive men, assuming they are real, is service, someone I can depend on and someone I can spend time with whether its sexual or not. I'm 55, plus sized and not really interested in sex itself any more. But, I like the play, or the science, still not the right word. I like exploration. I photograph old and ruined buildings because I want to see them and look at the details. I explore art because I like to make things. Anyway, I'm writing too much. I know very little about you.

You can't respond to this conversation because Mindless_Slave90 has deactivated their account, you've blocked them, or they've blocked you. 

His account was closed, by him. I don't know when he closed it but its far from the first time I have asked a man to tell me more about himself only to never hear from him again.
How can people not wonder if it is something about themselves? I do. I just try not to think about it too much. 

I think I say too much, give away too much about myself when they usually say almost nothing about themselves. I leave myself open to being shut out and it happens every time - the only difference is the length of time before it happens. This time it was just a few hours. I should have just ignored his note in the first place. Never a good feeling to let a little hope start and then find it dumped on again.  

02 December 2019

Grocery Shopping is a Thing

"is a thing now". Later in our human history people won't know that phrase was commonly used and commonly understood by most people. So, for posterity, I'm making note of it for future generations. (Who knows, someone might read this, eventually, far in the future).

Grocery shopping is a thing. Not new, but most people on the planet in whatever location, do go grocery shopping. It may be a weekly event, but not something turned into a national or international event (so far). Grocery shopping is more important than it's given credit for. As a couple we (my now ex-husband and I) would shop for groceries once a week with a shopping list of things we bought every week and things we had, or were, running out of (staples). Grocery shopping could be turbulent at times but it was a time for decision making and working things out as a couple. Afterwards we went out for dinner, our weekly night out. A simple plan which worked.

Small, ordinary events like grocery shopping are overlooked in relationships between people, particularly by people who think they want to live as Dominant and submissive 24 hours, 7 days a week.

First, being that way in public. Before your own wants/ needs remember you are exposing the public to your lifestyle/ fetish - without consent or permission. Consent between the couple, the partners, is only the surface. If you take your adventures public you expose random people and you don't know they will be okay with that. Assume not. Discretion is advised.

Second, grocery shopping is a functional event, you actually do need to purchase the supplies and staples you need. If you get home all happy about your adventures but without the milk, coffee cream, bread, rice, pasta, etc. you have failed to accomplish the task. Also, if you get wrapped up in the fun and forget to bring your shopping bags or anything else needed, that is also a fail. Of course, some people routinely forget to prepare ahead or forget the milk and need to make a second trip, that's bad planning and, if you were a submissive performing a task, you would be disciplined for it.

Third, and probably last, why are events like grocery shopping not seen as important? Men who offer themselves as submissives and slaves throw up a list of things they will do for the women they want to win over. But, they don't really know or think about the common things like grocery shopping. There is a joke, I see it posted in various forms, about women really wanting yard work, house work, home repairs and etc. from men when men offer sex, romance, etc. It's partially true.

Today for instance, what I'd really like is for someone to pull everything out of my bedroom closet and help me sort out what I still need versus all the rest of it. Then pack up the stuff I don't need and take it to the Salvation Army thrift store. It would be a job well done and I'd have space for other things which are taking up space in areas which were not intended as storage. After that, I'd like to stop for a good coffee somewhere in town, after we drop everything off at the thrift store. He could pay, because I'm still that old fashioned, I like a man who treats me to coffee and all those nice little, ordinary things. I don't mind splitting the bill for dinner, and I like treating others when I choose to, but the little things are a nice touch and not a big obligation, for me. Little things mean a lot but they don't have to tip the balance of power and control.

Grocery shopping is a little thing, in its way. Taken for granted. But, all those little events in life make life good and strong and purposeful. So, grocery shopping is a thing. A part of reality for couples who want to live the D/s lifestyle. Enjoy it, don't forget to plan ahead.